Man. I tell you what if this is what happens when you get old, I don’t want to. I’m coming home from work today and this old dude in a truck (much biggerer than my wee Jetta) bolts out in front of me like someone just lit his arse on fire. Now, mind you this was at the stupid quadrangle in town. There is a four-way near Main Street that literally saps all intelligence from people. It’s probably because it’s not really a true 4 way, but a 3 way that has an opening into a parking lot; not just any parking lot either. No… one with a liquor store.
So after busting a nutt to get in front of me, he stops at an intersection – he must have been sympathizing with the cross street (which was empty), and decided to stop just to be fair. After meandering onto the freeway, I finally get out from behind him after a 2 mile, 40 mph odyssey of speed and terror. The guy totally reminded me of Grandpa Simpson.
He’s not the only one in town, and if you have ever been to Florida, the cabbage heads there revel in the fact that they go slow on the freeway and in some cases believe themselves to be performing a safety service. Ha! That’s comedy. They make people safe by getting them madder than a 6 year old who just got his Optimus Prime taken away, that way they are so incensed that they blast into oncoming traffic just to get around them. Sounds safe to me.
Only 30 more years. I can’t wait….